A Time to Chill

The neon septuagenerian toddler who holds in his minuscule hands all of our lives and livelihoods—the gold-plated con man Donald J. Trump—today stood in front of cameras to gurgle and fester yet again. My faith in humanity, already tentative, is bent to its breaking point whenever the Great Dullard takes to a podium to publicly spew his frat-boy invective and inanities while we fail…

About Last Night: Bulls’ ball pressure

Cover sports far and wide enough, for long enough—say, from amateur roller hockey to world-class prizefights—and you soon figure out that less is said, either publicly or privately, the higher up the food chain you climb. A high school freshman tennis star would happily offer up mom and dad’s AmEx number for a picture in the local paper, whereas an NFL quarterback guards the identity of his…

The Cubs couldn’t help themselves—but then they did

Sloppy, stupid, bumbling and bedraggled, last night was as Chicago Cubs as Chicago Cubs gets. It was a parade of near-ineptitude, dragged out by the elements and a sheer ignorance of the elemental. It was dumb and silly and spiteful of all its best intentions. Except for the ending. In between brief moments of thoughtless and rote productivity, the players…

Peep This: My Pro-Persons Manifesto

Here’s a confession, and I’ll try not to put too fine a point on it: I loathe people. Now, I realize this could be taken as the acerbity of a crank or a sociopath or, say, Alec Baldwin, but walk with me for just a minute. People are dangerous. People vote for prom queens and American Idols. People, for…

Musings on an Angry Spine

Aged 41 years, my body is beginning to pick up rpm’s on it’s inexorable hurtle toward a state of uselessness. Happens to all of us, of course, but it’s never more demoralizing than when you realize in the moment, achieving total consciousness, that your once-vigorous and highly functional musculoskeletal system is now nearer to its…

Thanasis Antetokounmpo: Isn’t he lovely?

As part of my initiative to freshen up the blog more often, periodically this summer I’ll use this space to highlight some of the most interesting NBA-related Twitter accounts. To avoid reheating old material or discussing the obvious — Blake Griffin has a quirky, robust sense of humor; Kobe Bryant has a hilariously monolith ego — I’ll try to…